Life I like a box of chocolates. There might be one good one in there but you’ll never find it.

Life is like an oyster in that it’s very cramped and dark and I don’t know how to get out of here.

Life is like walking through a garden of rose bushes; everything is beautiful but you’re trying not to get caught on the thorns.

Life is like standing on stage in an empty ballroom talking into a microphone and every once in awhile someone sits, listens, claps and leaves.

Sometimes life is like one long, slow, endless, dark, Whales Mouth to Storyland Disney boat ride.

Life is just standing in line at the post office.

Life is one long software update.

Life is an open book in another language.

Life is like a basket of mismatched socks.

Life is hard but at least you have arms.

Life is hard but at least people don’t poop on the streets anymore.

Life is impossible. Just lie down and stare at the faces in the clouds.